What To Do When Burnout Draws Near

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More than one professional in various fields has one day of simply not coming to work, disappeared while on a business trip or screamed out his resignation letter to his colleagues. This is common enough to have its own name and is something everyone in a job involving high, persistent levels of stress is at risk of.

Long hours, high expectations and the occasional crisis will sap the emotional reserves of anyone sooner or later, especially when breaks from the strain are few and far between. The good news is that it is quite possible to bounce back from the early stages of burnout, which relies on a person realizing what warning signs should be looked out for.

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Simple Ways How You Can Support Your Spouse’s Career 

When two people come together and plan to spend the rest of their lives happily ever after, the question that is being posed is “How does a good marriage work?” However, as time pass by, and they grow individually, the question becomes the opposite, which is “How can this marriage positively affect his or her work?”  

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Simple Ways How You Can Support Your Spouse’s Career

When two people come together and plan to spend the rest of their lives happily ever after, the question that is being posed is “How does a good marriage work?” However, as time pass by, and they grow individually, the question becomes the opposite, which is “How can this marriage positively affect his or her work?”

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This is an entirely normal question and becomes very important in the long run. Being married to someone is like having a lifelong partner. You need to give your full support, care, understanding, love, and patience, so your spouse can achieve his or her ultimate potential.

One’s career is hugely aspirational and digs deep into a person’s self-actualization goals, the highest in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Here are simple ways to support your spouse’s career and make sure he or she aces at work:

1. Be Flexible And Understand Both Your Work Schedules

Being in different industries and fields, you and your spouse may not always have the same office hours. In a problematic scenario, your partner may be on a night shift, while you work the day job. Those are some crazy hours. Extend your patience and make sure you don’t get fired up on your spouse for dozing off when you feel like having a movie marathon, or when your spouse decides to go on a dinner date at a much later hour.

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2. Listen To The Rants And The Stories

It happens. Work will, one way or another, haunt a person even at home. If your partner has something to say about his or her day, listen. If there is an annoying story about how their boss powertrips them or gives them a ton load of work, listen. If there is anything good and uplifting about his or her new project, listen. The key is simply to listen and be there for your spouse. It’s a little thing, but it means a lot.

3. Acknowledge The Milestones

Is your spouse celebrating five years at work? Or perhaps your partner has been promoted to General Manager after two years? These are milestones that you shouldn’t miss, and you should definitely celebrate! These milestones won’t just affect a positive work attitude and performance; it will also help your spouse appreciate you more, as you take note of his or her progress. What do you know? Maybe you’ll get your quality time together after celebrating the promotion!

4. Contribute Ideas

Just because you’re not working together doesn’t mean you can’t strategize together. Try to be vigilant and see if your partner has trouble focusing and coming up with specific ideas for his or her work. You can share your thoughts and contribute some ideas that can help.

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5. Be The Reward

Tap on the shoulder is as good as saying “GOOD JOB!” But a warm hug, and a consoling kiss after a long, and tiring day, is something else. Supporting your spouse’s career doesn’t mean you give him or her space and make no room for both of you. Time spent together will still be the greatest reward and a much-awaited break from work.

Keeping these simple ways in mind can help you, and your spouse avoids unnecessary fights and dimming passion and intimacy. Remember that being in a relationship is also reciprocity. If you support your spouse with his or her career, for sure, you will be supported as well.

Communication:  Making Teens Talk And Listen

Talking to teenagers nowadays is difficult and more laborious more than ever. Parents find it challenging to build a good communication effectively with them.   One factor where relationship constraints occur between parents and their children is the problem of talking and trying to understand both parties. To understand teenagers’ feelings and thoughts, parents can employ different techniques. Here are examples of ways on how to encourage teens to express themselves and to practice active listening.  

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What Does It Mean To Become A Responsible Son Or Daughter?

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I am what people say as someone who has been raised as an independent child. At the age of 3, my mom already taught me how to dress up on my own and fix my bed in the morning. When I turned 5, I could babysit my little brother and prepare his milk formula. When I started going to elementary school, my dad would merely drop me off and pick me up at the bus stop.

“With regard to developing responsibility, many parents mistakenly assume their task is to coerce the child to do the deed until it is complete. This process does not generate responsibility; it produces resentment and dependence in being made to do something,” wrote Larry F. Waldman, PhD, ABPP.

In the eyes of practically every adult I know, I was a responsible offspring. I could take care of myself and even kids who are younger than me. I didn’t play outside, especially if my mother told me not to do so. I knew where to put all my toys back after playing with them. At the same time, however, I would hear them say, “I wish my child could carry such traits even when he becomes an adult.”

Indeed, now that I am a grown-up, I get that being a responsible offspring means more than knowing how to look after oneself or listening to parents. It also entails:

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Studying Hard For The Future

I believe it when someone says that life is not all about studying. You have to chill and try fun activities once in a while. Despite that, I have also realized the importance of studying hard to secure a fantastic future. Not every parent talks about it openly, but they feel a sense of pride whenever they see their child taking their education seriously. After all, it is one of the few gifts that cannot be taken away by anyone.

Not Giving Permanent Headache To Parents

A responsible son or daughter knows better than to do something that will give their mom and dad permanent headache as well. E.g., going to jail due to a crime, using drugs and refusing to quit, staying in a constant state of unemployment, etc.

Thinking About Loved Ones Before Making Huge Decisions

Only an irresponsible offspring will jump to rash decisions, such as leaving a job without looking for a new one or dropping out of school without any concrete plan for the future. They say it will make them happy, but they don’t think about how it will affect their parents. If you want to show your maturity, you should not do such things.

Marilyn Price-Mitchell, PhD, wrote, “As they consider these moral dilemmas, they reach deep within themselves and think about their values. Through reflection, talking with others, and linking their values to the issues that impact them, young people experience a shift in perspective.”

Understanding Bad Habits And Changing It

Responsible kids do not have to be told twice or a hundred times about their negative behaviors. They do not get upset either if their mom and dad tell them that what they are doing is wrong. Instead, they try to see the situation in the parents’ perspective. Upon realizing their fault, they are not afraid to apologize for their actions and correct them.

According to Rachelle Mand, PhD, MFT, “A child, who is accountable for his actions, generally turns out to be a responsible adult. Learning to take responsibility for our actions is the very definition of becoming an adult.”

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Giving Back To Parents Even If They Insist That You Shouldn’t

It is typical for parents to stop their son or daughter from spending on them. They say, “Keep your money – we didn’t support you all these years so that you can feed us.” While you should respect their decision not to make you pay for their bills, you should insist on giving them a bit of luxury. For instance, you can take them to their dream destination or treat them to excellent meals every week.

Final Thoughts

Being responsible is one of the many ways to tell your mom and dad, “Thank you for raising me this way.” And even if you did not grow up close to your parents, it is never too late to alter your behavior and shower them with love and goodness.

 

Ways To Deal With A Parasitic Sibling

I have two younger sisters, and I love them to death. From the moment I got my first paycheck, I have made it my duty to give them everything they need. You can say that it is my way of giving back to my parents, who have supported me all through college.

During my first job, my middle sister, Anne, was still doing her internship in the hospitality sector. When you are in that industry, you always have to look good, so I would buy her clothes, shoes, makeup, etc. Even though I knew that my mom and dad gave her monetary allowance every week, I would transfer a couple of hundred dollars in her bank account. That way, she would have more than enough money to buy her needs.

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Before Anne graduated, we had a heart-to-heart talk. She told me how much she idolizes me for being a responsible big sister and daughter. She said that her goal was to follow my footsteps and do what I did for her to our youngest sister, who was still in high school at the time. Of course, the idea made me happy and looked forward to the day she could genuinely do that.

The problem is, in three years since she has entered the workforce, she has changed jobs thrice as well. Her complaint about the first workplace was that the pay was low. We were like, “Okay, that’s understandable. Look for another job.” I supported her financially while looking for a second employer. After finding one, though, she left it after another year, saying that it was too exhausting for her. We tolerated her again. Once more, I gave her money to apply for another job because she didn’t get to save her salary.

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It only hit me that my family and I are enabling my parasitic middle sister when she’s talking about leaving her third job to become a flight attendant. There won’t be any issue with that if it’s an upgrade from her previous one. However, the offered salary was only a third of what she gets from her current position. Worse, she has no money to sustain her needs while training as a flight attendant because she blew all her salary for clothes, shoes, and whatnot. It’s aggravating!

In this case, let me tell you how I dealt with her.

Brutal Honesty Is Key

The hard truth is that my parents have been complaining about my sister’s behavior already. With every job change, after all, they have to help her move all her cabinets, too. I told Anne that she’s being a pain in the you-know-what instead of assisting the family.

I also mentioned that she is becoming a financial burden, and that is not okay. Our obligation to support her financially should be over from the moment she graduated from college. Even if she knows we have money to spare, it doesn’t give her the right to let us worry about that.

I explained to my parents how wrong it is to enable a full-grown adult even further. It pained me to tell my sister these words, but I had to for everyone’s sake: “If you quit your current job, you cannot expect us to help you out again to get your next one.”

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How Did It Turn Out?

My parasitic sister was not happy at first, of course. She’s used to getting what she wants, and all of a sudden, we’re putting our feet down. Despite that, it woke her up from her dream that she could act like someone fresh out of college every time she wants a new job. Now, before making any decision, she thinks a hundred times before doing it. There was a bit of yelling and crying in the beginning, but it turned out to be a win-win situation for all.

You are most welcome to follow my lead if your sibling starts acting like a parasite as well.

 

How To Avoid Becoming The Black Sheep In The Family

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Coming from a family that is full of successful individuals in their respective fields has its ups and downs. As you build your career, these people can serve as your inspiration as well, for one. In case you require a tutor for a specific course, you can ask a relative to do it for you. It is also significant that if you ever need a doctor, lawyer, or financial adviser, you don’t have to call someone else. If it is a close cousin or a sibling or a parent, you probably even have them on speed dial.

The downside of having high achievers as family members, however, is that failing is practically not an option. You can make mistakes along the way, sure, but you need to come back better and stronger from that. Otherwise, you will tarnish your family’s fantastic reputation in society, and everyone will brand you as the “black sheep.”

“Anyone can be the black sheep for just about any reason,” explained Jerry Hellison, PhD. “The black sheep is simply the person who deviates from the family rules.”

Now, if you think that you are close to being named as such in your family, here’s what you can do to avoid it.

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Know Your Real Passion

“You are not required to be like your parents or siblings,” said Jennifer Delgado, PhD.

The first thing that you should do is to figure out where your heart lies. Is it photography? Do you like teaching children? Do you want to be a pediatric surgeon?

There is no wrong answer at this point; you are free to be passionate about anything. What’s not ideal is wasting your time on trials and errors, even though you know deep down that that is not something you want to do.

Stick To Your Passion

It seems typical for family members to offer suggestions about what you should do when you grow up. Your parents might say, “You should get a Business degree so that you can take over our company in the future.” Your favorite aunt might say, “Oh, that’s nonsense. You should become a dermatologist like me!”

“Be proud of your differences. Focus on the ways you are stronger today because of what you have been through,” wrote Elizabeth Dorrance Hall, PhD. “Try to reframe your marginalization as positive even while acknowledging that it is painful.”

I kid you not if you enter the business or medical field only because your loved ones told you so, you won’t be happy. You will be no different from the other millennials who wait tables to make ends meet, even if they dream of walking on the runway or becoming a pilot. You need to stick to your passion as that will allow you to excel in your craft and feel proud about it.

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Don’t Obligate Your Family To Clean Up Your Mess

As mentioned above, making mistakes is a part of life. Perhaps the elders in your family have had their fair share of errors in the past, too. They will not disown you if you slip up a few times or want to change your career. The only time it can happen is if you hide your mistakes to them and then obligate them to iron out your problems.

Final Thoughts

Ideally, your loved ones have worked so hard to give you privileges that others cannot have. You should not waste this opportunity by being indecisive and becoming the black sheep in the family.

Learning About Work-Life Balance Through Tony Petrello’s Life Story

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Tony Petrello, the Chief Executive Officer of Nabor Industries, among other things, has proven his value at the helm of one of the leading oil drilling companies in the United States many times over that the institution compensates him well enough to become included in the list of highest-paid leaders in the recent years. With the implementation of great strategies, the company just entered an exclusive joint venture agreement with Saudi Aramco not too long ago to expand the number of oil rigs that they both handle.

Although there are more things that Tony Petrello has done on behalf of Nabor, it seems right to know the person behind all these achievements.

As A Friend

Anthony “Tony” Petrello was a mathematics genius and a friendly and approachable man when he was still getting his education, according to his old roommate, Lloyd Grove. Granted, it had been years when they last caught up with each other. However, Lloyd had written in the article featuring Tony that he remained as the humble pal he once knew. When he exchanged messages with the guy for the first time once again, the latter mentioned that he believed it was his luck and not the smarts that placed him in his current position in the industry.

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As A Student

Tony Petrello is an alumnus of a couple of Ivy League schools. Whereas he obtained a Juris Doctor degree at the Harvard Law School, he graduated from Yale University with a Master’s in Mathematics.

As A Professional

Right after college, Petrello got to utilize his knowledge about the legal world when he got employed at Baker & McKenzie, a law office that focused on providing assistance to clients regarding taxation, international arbitration, and business laws, in 1979. Tony stayed in the same position for a total of seven years before he became promoted as a Managing Partner in Baker & McKenzie’s firm within New York by 1986. He only forwarded his resignation letter in 1991.

However, retirement was short-lived for Anthony Petrello because he also entered Nabor Industries within the same year. Once he stepped into the new company, he immediately got appointed as a President, as well as a Chief Operating Officer of the corporation.

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The progression of the positions he held in Nabors Industries did not halt there as he was able to demonstrate his intelligence and management skills after becoming a Deputy Chairman by 2003, a Chief Executive Officer in 2011, and a Board Chairman of the Executive Committee of the Board of Directors come 2012. What is interesting about Petrello is that he still handles the same positions at present. It is proof that the other executives working for Nabors Industries believe in what Tony is capable of doing.

As A Philanthropist

In addition to his well-decorated employment history, Petrello has a soft heart for kids suffering from neurological diseases. Intending to help as many as he could, he became a part of the Texas Children’s Hospital’s Board of Trustees.

Final Thoughts

Getting acknowledged for so many great deeds can put anyone’s life in a state of chaos. However, that doesn’t seem to be the case with Tony Petrello. He does his job well and not allow the praises to fill his head.

If we can act the same way that Tony Petrello does, we may not have issues with our work-life balance either.

Tips In Making Time For Family (From A Therapist)

Family is the primary institution of society. Everyone belongs to a family, which means that no one is alone. However, over the years, we have found out that many families end up getting broken because of many factors. One of the common causes for the divorce of parents and consequent destruction of the family is the lack of time for the family. According to a therapist, many people in modern times are more focused on building their career or business. These individuals have already forgotten how to raise their own family.

 

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Because of this, we have decided to gather a list of tips and suggestions that you should consider if you want to have a happy family at all times. Our primary focus is to provide ideas on how one can make time for a family. Make sure that you read the entirety of this article to understand the different items mentioned. Here are some of the essential lessons that you must know:

 

Remember Your Kids

 

You must take a moment to appreciate the presence of a family in your life. You have to focus on the fact that you already have kids who need your time and attention.

“If you are working all the time, you are missing out on the family events that you can’t replace,” explained Magdalena Battles, PhD. “Kids grow up fast and they don’t get to repeat their childhood.”

Make sure to stop thinking that just because they have lots of gifts, they can already be okay. Unfortunately, many parents cover their absence by giving gifts to their kids. This move is completely erroneous because it teaches the young ones to have a distant relationship with their parents. For sure, you do not want this to happen to your children. To make you feel more motivated to spend quality time with them, then always put them in your mind.

 

Go On Family Dates

 

Make your kids happy by bringing them together with some friends at school or in your subdivision. All you have to do is to send an invitation to the parents of the said children wherein you will encourage them to spend some time with you. The beautiful thing about this idea is that you can give your children a chance to get to know with each other before it becomes too late. However, you need to see to it that those who will join your family dates are nice and competent people. Otherwise, you may end up suffering more disadvantages instead of the advantages. Spending quality time with other families will teach your child the importance of building strong relationships within the community.

 

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Travel Together

 

If you have a long period away from work, you should use it to travel together. There is nothing more fun and exciting than organizing an enjoyable tour activity for everyone in the family. As such, you need to prepare their passports ahead of time. Take note that you may not know when the exact time your application will be approved. However, if you are only traveling locally, then you can always go to new cities through domestic flights or road trips. In moving together, you can renew your relationship with each other. At the same time, it can also make the family bond last longer because of the new experiences. When it comes to this matter, it is best if you will make the arrangements ahead of time.

“Allow lots of extra time cushions – a good practice is to think about how much time each part of the process SHOULD take, and at least double it,” Emily Edlynn, PhD, recommended.

 

Cook For The Family

When was the last time you prepared a sumptuous meal for everyone in the family? If you can no longer remember the day, then it is time to do it again as soon as possible.

“The family that eats together thrives together,” said Vanessa Lapointe, PhD. “Mealtime has historically been a time of family togetherness. Plus, if you’re getting multiple generations together, then there is tapestry of diversity in terms of ages and interests and that is just so good for kids.”

Invite your family members to come over on a Sunday and serve them your best dish. It is also ideal if you can also tell them to bring some of the food items that they want to share with everyone. In organizing this kind of gathering, the best thing that you must never forget is to get the attendance of all your family members ahead of time. You need to see to it that everyone will attend the little gathering so that you can bond with each other again. You can also prepare some exciting games and activities for the kids.

 

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Remember that family must always come first. No amount of money can ever buy you lost time with family members. Make sure that you make each and everyone feel valued. Go out of the way to make them smile at all times.

 

I Make Myself Complete – My Psychologist’s Reminder

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I used to be very fat, as in I was truly overweight – overly obese even. From 53 kilograms when I was eighteen years old, I became 102 kilos at thirty-six. I used to reason out that in between those eighteen years of gaining weight, it was due to my five children. Each child, I had gained weight and I never really bothered about my looks after I got married. My psychologist said that it was because of my depression.

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