Are You Ready To Get Married? (Ask A Therapist)

White gown with a long trail, walking down the aisle, with the man of her dreams waiting for her at the front of the altar. This has always been every girl’s dream as she fantasizes about her own ever after.


But is he your knight in shining armor? And are you his sweet smiling princess? Can you afford a wedding with a castle full of guests?  Is it really your happily ever after?


You Are No Longer That Five-Year-Old Sweet Girl

Almost every sweet girl dreams of how she will meet her prince charming, how their wedding will look like, and that they will live happily ever after.  While you are so obsessed with your own fairy tales, you forget to consider that you’re no longer five years old this time, and you are no longer in your fantasy world.  It is the reality, and you are facing the man you are about to marry.  Have you asked yourself if you are really ready to get married?


Your Knight In Shining Armor

He is no Mr. Perfect, and you are not yourself either.  He may not always make you laugh, and he will not be as charming as you thought him to be.  Will you be willing to accept his every flaw?  Like everyone else, he makes mistakes.  He will fall short of your expectations.  He is not the ideal man who will always be there for you physically to support you, open the door for you, or pull out a chair.  He is not the hero who will sweep you off your feet with his dazzling moves.   Are you willing to accept that your Mr. Perfect is not the Mr. Perfect in your dreams?


You Are Not Always The Sweet Princess

You also have your inner demons for you are human.  All couples go through trials and temptations, and you can’t be sweet and understanding all the time.  Marriage life is not your bed of roses.  As husband and wife, you will at one point need to pass on a rocky road and cross a stormy sea.  Will you survive it, just as how a queen waits for his king when he goes to the battlefield, standing firm with dignity?


Your Castle Full Of Guests Wedding

When you were five years old, you never thought of considering how much the budget would be, and with your limitless budget goes your boundless imagination.  Frustration begins when your dream wedding would not pan out the way you always imagined it to be, the way you repeatedly talked about it with your friends.  You can’t afford your fairytale princess-type dress, an extravagant cake that is ceiling high, your horse and the carriage that will bring you to the church, the grand ballroom which can accommodate all your guests plus the sumptuous meal that is going to be served for everybody’s satisfaction.


Marriage is a commitment.  It is accepting and embracing a new life with your significant other for whoever he is.  He may not be your Mr. Perfect, but you can give him a chance to be your Mr. Right, who you share same values with, same goals in the relationship, and have the same depth of love and desire for one another.  He who can bring out the best in you, someone you can show your true self to.   He who is willing to do his best to provide for you and your family’s needs.


Are you ready to commit yourself in a lifelong commitment with a person who is entirely different from you, take your vows of for better, for worse, for richer or for poorer, and in sickness and in health, until death do you part?

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