Author: Eugene Perez (page 1 of 3)

What Does It Mean To Become A Responsible Son Or Daughter?

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I am what people say as someone who has been raised as an independent child. At the age of 3, my mom already taught me how to dress up on my own and fix my bed in the morning. When I turned 5, I could babysit my little brother and prepare his milk formula. When I started going to elementary school, my dad would merely drop me off and pick me up at the bus stop.

In the eyes of practically every adult I know, I was a responsible offspring. I could take care of myself and even kids who are younger than me. I didn’t play outside, especially if my mother told me not to do so. I knew where to put all my toys back after playing with them. At the same time, however, I would hear them say, “I wish my child could carry such traits even when he becomes an adult.”

Indeed, now that I am a grown-up, I get that being a responsible offspring means more than knowing how to look after oneself or listening to parents. It also entails:

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Studying Hard For The Future

I believe it when someone says that life is not all about studying. You have to chill and try fun activities once in a while. Despite that, I have also realized the importance of studying hard to secure a fantastic future. Not every parent talks about it openly, but they feel a sense of pride whenever they see their child taking their education seriously. After all, it is one of the few gifts that cannot be taken away by anyone.

Not Giving Permanent Headache To Parents

A responsible son or daughter knows better than to do something that will give their mom and dad permanent headache as well. E.g., going to jail due to a crime, using drugs and refusing to quit, staying in a constant state of unemployment, etc.

Thinking About Loved Ones Before Making Huge Decisions

Only an irresponsible offspring will jump to rash decisions, such as leaving a job without looking for a new one or dropping out of school without any concrete plan for the future. They say it will make them happy, but they don’t think about how it will affect their parents. If you want to show your maturity, you should not do such things.

Understanding Bad Habits And Changing It

Responsible kids do not have to be told twice or a hundred times about their negative behaviors. They do not get upset either if their mom and dad tell them that what they are doing is wrong. Instead, they try to see the situation in the parents’ perspective. Upon realizing their fault, they are not afraid to apologize for their actions and correct them.

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Giving Back To Parents Even If They Insist That You Shouldn’t

It is typical for parents to stop their son or daughter from spending on them. They say, “Keep your money – we didn’t support you all these years so that you can feed us.” While you should respect their decision not to make you pay for their bills, you should insist on giving them a bit of luxury. For instance, you can take them to their dream destination or treat them to excellent meals every week.

Final Thoughts

Being responsible is one of the many ways to tell your mom and dad, “Thank you for raising me this way.” And even if you did not grow up close to your parents, it is never too late to alter your behavior and shower them with love and goodness.

 

Ways To Deal With A Parasitic Sibling

I have two younger sisters, and I love them to death. From the moment I got my first paycheck, I have made it my duty to give them everything they need. You can say that it is my way of giving back to my parents, who have supported me all through college.

During my first job, my middle sister, Anne, was still doing her internship in the hospitality sector. When you are in that industry, you always have to look good, so I would buy her clothes, shoes, makeup, etc. Even though I knew that my mom and dad gave her monetary allowance every week, I would transfer a couple of hundred dollars in her bank account. That way, she would have more than enough money to buy her needs.

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Before Anne graduated, we had a heart-to-heart talk. She told me how much she idolizes me for being a responsible big sister and daughter. She said that her goal was to follow my footsteps and do what I did for her to our youngest sister, who was still in high school at the time. Of course, the idea made me happy and looked forward to the day she could genuinely do that.

The problem is, in three years since she has entered the workforce, she has changed jobs thrice as well. Her complaint about the first workplace was that the pay was low. We were like, “Okay, that’s understandable. Look for another job.” I supported her financially while looking for a second employer. After finding one, though, she left it after another year, saying that it was too exhausting for her. We tolerated her again. Once more, I gave her money to apply for another job because she didn’t get to save her salary.

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It only hit me that my family and I are enabling my parasitic middle sister when she’s talking about leaving her third job to become a flight attendant. There won’t be any issue with that if it’s an upgrade from her previous one. However, the offered salary was only a third of what she gets from her current position. Worse, she has no money to sustain her needs while training as a flight attendant because she blew all her salary for clothes, shoes, and whatnot. It’s aggravating!

In this case, let me tell you how I dealt with her.

Brutal Honesty Is Key

The hard truth is that my parents have been complaining about my sister’s behavior already. With every job change, after all, they have to help her move all her cabinets, too. I told Anne that she’s being a pain in the you-know-what instead of assisting the family.

I also mentioned that she is becoming a financial burden, and that is not okay. Our obligation to support her financially should be over from the moment she graduated from college. Even if she knows we have money to spare, it doesn’t give her the right to let us worry about that.

I explained to my parents how wrong it is to enable a full-grown adult even further. It pained me to tell my sister these words, but I had to for everyone’s sake: “If you quit your current job, you cannot expect us to help you out again to get your next one.”

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How Did It Turn Out?

My parasitic sister was not happy at first, of course. She’s used to getting what she wants, and all of a sudden, we’re putting our feet down. Despite that, it woke her up from her dream that she could act like someone fresh out of college every time she wants a new job. Now, before making any decision, she thinks a hundred times before doing it. There was a bit of yelling and crying in the beginning, but it turned out to be a win-win situation for all.

You are most welcome to follow my lead if your sibling starts acting like a parasite as well.

 

How To Avoid Becoming The Black Sheep In The Family

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Coming from a family that is full of successful individuals in their respective fields has its ups and downs. As you build your career, these people can serve as your inspiration as well, for one. In case you require a tutor for a specific course, you can ask a relative to do it for you. It is also significant that if you ever need a doctor, lawyer, or financial adviser, you don’t have to call someone else. If it is a close cousin or a sibling or a parent, you probably even have them on speed dial.

The downside of having high achievers as family members, however, is that failing is practically not an option. You can make mistakes along the way, sure, but you need to come back better and stronger from that. Otherwise, you will tarnish your family’s fantastic reputation in society, and everyone will brand you as the “black sheep.”

Now, if you think that you are close to being named as such in your family, here’s what you can do to avoid it.

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Know Your Real Passion

The first thing that you should do is to figure out where your heart lies. Is it photography? Do you like teaching children? Do you want to be a pediatric surgeon?

There is no wrong answer at this point; you are free to be passionate about anything. What’s not ideal is wasting your time on trials and errors, even though you know deep down that that is not something you want to do.

Stick To Your Passion

It seems typical for family members to offer suggestions about what you should do when you grow up. Your parents might say, “You should get a Business degree so that you can take over our company in the future.” Your favorite aunt might say, “Oh, that’s nonsense. You should become a dermatologist like me!”

I kid you not if you enter the business or medical field only because your loved ones told you so, you won’t be happy. You will be no different from the other millennials who wait tables to make ends meet, even if they dream of walking on the runway or becoming a pilot. You need to stick to your passion as that will allow you to excel in your craft and feel proud about it.

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Don’t Obligate Your Family To Clean Up Your Mess

As mentioned above, making mistakes is a part of life. Perhaps the elders in your family have had their fair share of errors in the past, too. They will not disown you if you slip up a few times or want to change your career. The only time it can happen is if you hide your mistakes to them and then obligate them to iron out your problems.

Final Thoughts

Ideally, your loved ones have worked so hard to give you privileges that others cannot have. You should not waste this opportunity by being indecisive and becoming the black sheep in the family.

Learning About Work-Life Balance Through Tony Petrello’s Life Story

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Tony Petrello, the Chief Executive Officer of Nabor Industries, among other things, has proven his value at the helm of one of the leading oil drilling companies in the United States many times over that the institution compensates him well enough to become included in the list of highest-paid leaders in the recent years. With the implementation of great strategies, the company just entered an exclusive joint venture agreement with Saudi Aramco not too long ago to expand the number of oil rigs that they both handle.

Although there are more things that Tony Petrello has done on behalf of Nabor, it seems right to know the person behind all these achievements.

As A Friend

Anthony “Tony” Petrello was a mathematics genius and a friendly and approachable man when he was still getting his education, according to his old roommate, Lloyd Grove. Granted, it had been years when they last caught up with each other. However, Lloyd had written in the article featuring Tony that he remained as the humble pal he once knew. When he exchanged messages with the guy for the first time once again, the latter mentioned that he believed it was his luck and not the smarts that placed him in his current position in the industry.

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As A Student

Tony Petrello is an alumnus of a couple of Ivy League schools. Whereas he obtained a Juris Doctor degree at the Harvard Law School, he graduated from Yale University with a Master’s in Mathematics.

As A Professional

Right after college, Petrello got to utilize his knowledge about the legal world when he got employed at Baker & McKenzie, a law office that focused on providing assistance to clients regarding taxation, international arbitration, and business laws, in 1979. Tony stayed in the same position for a total of seven years before he became promoted as a Managing Partner in Baker & McKenzie’s firm within New York by 1986. He only forwarded his resignation letter in 1991.

However, retirement was short-lived for Anthony Petrello because he also entered Nabor Industries within the same year. Once he stepped into the new company, he immediately got appointed as a President, as well as a Chief Operating Officer of the corporation.

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The progression of the positions he held in Nabors Industries did not halt there as he was able to demonstrate his intelligence and management skills after becoming a Deputy Chairman by 2003, a Chief Executive Officer in 2011, and a Board Chairman of the Executive Committee of the Board of Directors come 2012. What is interesting about Petrello is that he still handles the same positions at present. It is proof that the other executives working for Nabors Industries believe in what Tony is capable of doing.

As A Philanthropist

In addition to his well-decorated employment history, Petrello has a soft heart for kids suffering from neurological diseases. Intending to help as many as he could, he became a part of the Texas Children’s Hospital’s Board of Trustees.

Final Thoughts

Getting acknowledged for so many great deeds can put anyone’s life in a state of chaos. However, that doesn’t seem to be the case with Tony Petrello. He does his job well and not allow the praises to fill his head.

If we can act the same way that Tony Petrello does, we may not have issues with our work-life balance either.

Tips In Making Time For Family (From A Therapist)

Family is the primary institution of society. Everyone belongs to a family, which means that no one is alone. However, over the years, we have found out that many families end up getting broken because of many factors. One of the common causes for the divorce of parents and consequent destruction of the family is the lack of time for the family. According to a therapist, many people in modern times are more focused on building their career or business. These individuals have already forgotten how to raise their own family.

 

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Because of this, we have decided to gather a list of tips and suggestions that you should consider if you want to have a happy family at all times. Our primary focus is to provide ideas on how one can make time for a family. Make sure that you read the entirety of this article to understand the different items mentioned. Here are some of the essential lessons that you must know:

 

Remember Your Kids

 

You must take a moment to appreciate the presence of a family in your life. You have to focus on the fact that you already have kids who need your time and attention. Make sure to stop thinking that just because they have lots of gifts, they can already be okay. Unfortunately, many parents cover their absence by giving gifts to their kids. This move is completely erroneous because it teaches the young ones to have a distant relationship with their parents. For sure, you do not want this to happen to your children. To make you feel more motivated to spend quality time with them, then always put them in your mind.

 

Go On Family Dates

 

Make your kids happy by bringing them together with some friends at school or in your subdivision. All you have to do is to send an invitation to the parents of the said children wherein you will encourage them to spend some time with you. The beautiful thing about this idea is that you can give your children a chance to get to know with each other before it becomes too late. However, you need to see to it that those who will join your family dates are nice and competent people. Otherwise, you may end up suffering more disadvantages instead of the advantages. Spending quality time with other families will teach your child the importance of building strong relationships within the community.

 

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Travel Together

 

If you have a long period away from work, you should use it to travel together. There is nothing more fun and exciting than organizing an enjoyable tour activity for everyone in the family. As such, you need to prepare their passports ahead of time. Take note that you may not know when the exact time your application will be approved. However, if you are only traveling locally, then you can always go to new cities through domestic flights or road trips. In moving together, you can renew your relationship with each other. At the same time, it can also make the family bond last longer because of the new experiences. When it comes to this matter, it is best if you will make the arrangements ahead of time.

 

Cook For The Family

 

When was the last time you prepared a sumptuous meal for everyone in the family? If you can no longer remember the day, then it is time to do it again as soon as possible. Invite your family members to come over on a Sunday and serve them your best dish. It is also ideal if you can also tell them to bring some of the food items that they want to share with everyone. In organizing this kind of gathering, the best thing that you must never forget is to get the attendance of all your family members ahead of time. You need to see to it that everyone will attend the little gathering so that you can bond with each other again. You can also prepare some exciting games and activities for the kids.

 

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Remember that family must always come first. No amount of money can ever buy you lost time with family members. Make sure that you make each and everyone feel valued. Go out of the way to make them smile at all times.

 

I Make Myself Complete – My Psychologist’s Reminder

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I used to be very fat, as in I was truly overweight – overly obese even. From 53 kilograms when I was eighteen years old, I became 102 kilos at thirty-six. I used to reason out that in between those eighteen years of gaining weight, it was due to my five children. Each child, I had gained weight and I never really bothered about my looks after I got married. My psychologist said that it was because of my depression.

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How To Improve Parent-Child Relationship In The Family?

People must have heard it from a couple of family therapy or counseling they attended that “there is no such thing as a perfect family.” Same goes to an ideal parent-child relationship. Yes, most of the times, parents often think that everything they do is always for the benefit of their child. That’s because they love and value him. However, some actions are not necessarily healthy for both of them. Because as the child grows up and reaches his teenage years, it usually becomes the time that takes turns for the worst. There are frequent arguments, increased misunderstanding, and a lot of relationship inconsistencies. It is a situation that takes everything out in order. With this specific state, there should have to be a solution. Here are some practical ways that help strengthens parent-child relationships.

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Show Affection

A psychologist once stated that the older a person gets, the more fragile he becomes physically. That’s because when a child starts his teenage years, he becomes more reluctant to show his parents affection such as hugging. Perhaps they consider it as not “appropriate” anymore. So when the child becomes more independent, showing affection gets lowered to a minimum. It then begins to create a gap within the relationship and soon can escalate into getting severe social and emotional problems. Therefore, contact with other people is increasingly essential for the development of overall health. That’s due to the impact of hugging that serves as a stress reliever. And when a child continually shows affection daily, it becomes a constant reminder that he is not unaccompanied in both physical and emotional needs.

Connect With The Family Before Any Transitions

Connecting to the family before any transitions or large decision-making is vital in keeping the relationship healthy. Making transitions can be challenging, especially in teenage years. It’s because it is the time that the child is trying to figure out who he is and what kind of life he wants to live. There will be many days that the child will become uncertain about which direction to choose as well. Therefore, parents should become important guidance. They should never hesitate to approach their kid so he’ll never feel left alone. Parents should provide helpful insights that the child can use for future decision-making reference.

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Make Time To Create A Memorable Bonding

When the child tends to get older, he gets to experience a lot of responsibilities along the way. There will be an instance that he’ll decide to build and enhance the skills he wants for a perfect career path. Meaning, there’s a big chance the kid will isolate himself from family and peers as he ages. It is a great time to consider creating a memorable family bonding in this situation. Because when both are already juggling work and social life, the parent-child relationship appears to be limited. With all the exhaustion both may feel, they might end up losing interest in filling time together. So spending at least 10 to 15 minutes of meaningful conversation can boost the parent-child relationship. Or maybe both can consider to set aside an hour and make dinner together during the weekend. It’s simple as it seems, but it creates overall wellness for both individuals.

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Encourage Emotions Instead Of Shutting Them Out

People’s emotions are consistently messy. Therefore, being mindful to another person’s feelings is essential. There’s no valid reason to dismiss it, particularly during any arguments. Yes, regulating emotions can be tough because an individual can get strongly affected by the situation. But it’s vital to understand that a healthy parent-child relationship comes from the buildup of proper communication despite the unwanted emotional response. There’s a significant psychological reason why neglecting emotions can be dangerous to one’s health. So even if both parent and child have trouble discussing the source of pain, they have to. As long as they focus on listening to understand instead with the intent to react, both sides can determine where each of them is coming from.

A parent-child relationship doesn’t happen automatically. It takes a lot of time, adjustments, effort, and tons of understanding. As long as both sides are willing to cooperate, they can build a significant connection.

Health, Work, And Life Balance

You probably read a lot of articles and watch tons of videos on the internet about the proper way of balancing life and work. But are they exactly the fundamentals of living? Well, you don’t have to oppose the idea of work-life balance if you want. However, you might have to consider health and wellness for that matter.

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Life As You Know It

You probably wonder about the quality of life you are having right now. You can’t say that you perfectly managed your time, family, friends, and job all at their expense because that’s way too impossible to do. Honestly, the whole idea of balancing things all together is doing more harm than good. The truth is, there’s no virtue of adjusting things in life without having to sacrifice a more significant part of it. And real talk, there’s no perfect management for everything. You may feel okay with the concept of life balance in general. That when it fits nicely to your ways, you become eager to repeat the routine over and over again. But it’s not always easy at it seems. Yes, work and life can both go along with each other. But there’s only one problem with that though. And that’s the assumption that work is separated from your life and doesn’t affect your overall health. The idea doesn’t make sense because these three things don’t exclusively function separately.

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Your work and health is the fundamental component of your life. Therefore, you can’t balance only a part of it without touching the other portion. It becomes a delusion that you think you can potentially segregate the things you have to do with the stuff you need and want to do. Sticking to this kind of mentality will only make you suffer throughout your life. Let’s state a scenario that will make you understand more.

Perhaps you want to go out with friends and attend a party. Maybe drink a little. You know you “want it.” But you also have to be in the office early in the morning. You “need” to be there. You also know that even though you’ll be happy bonding with friends, you might end up drinking a lot. You know that’s going to be bad for your health. But let’s assume you did all three things together. You hung out with friends, drank a lot of alcohol, and went to the office early in the morning. Yes, it is an achievement. But how does it make you feel after? Is it that fulfilling? Of course, it’s not.

Every Decisions Matter

With that particular instance, the only thing you can do is choose between the options. Either you will attend the party and don’t go to work tomorrow, attend the gathering but not drink and party hard so you can wake up early, or you can stay at home and prepare yourself for your job the next day. The whole point of this is, you don’t often need to have the great stuff to be able to balance things in life. You don’t always get what you want too because there are sacrifices to make. And when you care a lot about things, you might have to sacrifices a lot as well. That’s pretty much depressing, isn’t that right? No one can handle proper decision-making. That’s especially when the things they want battles with the things they need and have to do. With that, it gets challenging to process physical, emotional and mental strength that helps in grinding through the rest of what life has to offer.

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When you insist on managing and balancing all aspects of life without considering consequences, you might end up spending a considerable portion being stressed out and depressed. Yes, you might potentially pull it off and handle everything in your preference, but it’s more like you’ll become resentful and unhappy with your decisions. At this point, you will eventually lose everything, and that’s a bad thing to happen. So instead of trying to get a hold of what you think you “can” always handle, try considering values that matter most. At least set your priorities, responsibilities, and goals so that you can work on it one at a time. You don’t have to rush it nor handle it all together to achieve it.

23 Signs That Says You’re Not Clinically Hyperactive (ADHD)

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Online quizzes and tests for Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder are now available, but these are not definitive. It can only guide you and give you a sense of what ADHD is. It is a great relief when you find out that you do not have an ADHD, and here are 23 signs which you should take in mind. (Share this with your family.)

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