Perks Of Quarantining With Family

When the coronavirus outbreak reports rolled in, I was at my hometown, visiting my parents for the weekend. I felt fortunate because it happened while I was with them, not when I was in New York. I lived alone in the Big Apple, you see, and it would have been challenging to quarantine on my own.

The thing is, what I deemed a blessing in disguise turned out to be a nightmare for some of my friends who also had to isolate themselves with their family. One went as far as saying that she would rather risk catching the virus on the way to work than spend days with her folks. I did not comment on that, though, because I could not see the appeal of quarantining alone when you could stay with others—your family members, no less.

Here are the perks of being under quarantine with your loved ones.

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You Get Zero Chances Of Feeling Lonely

The primary benefit of getting quarantined with your family is that you won’t ever feel lonely. You have known these people all your life; being with them is better than staying with your entire circle of friends. There is no need to put on any act around them because they will accept every facet of your character, good or bad.

At the same time, your family knows you from inside out. They can tell what upsets you or makes you happy; they will give you anything you need even before you ask for it. Your days will undoubtedly experience loneliness since your loved ones may try to come up with ways to see you and everyone else in the house smiling.

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You Can Rebuild Your Bond With Loved Ones

It is no secret that some rifts form between family members over the years. For instance, a parent and adult child disagrees on something and stops talking for weeks, or a brother and sister keeps on fighting and decides to part ways. If, for some reason, you end up quarantining under a single roof, you should take it as a sign that you can now rebuild your relationship with your loved ones.

Doing so may feel impossible or awkward at first. You may not be willing to reconcile with anyone, especially if you think you have never been at fault. However, remember that you belong to a family. Considering you can forgive a friend who always borrows money from you or never shows up on time, you should also try to forgive your loved ones.

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You Will Realize That Blood Is Thicker Than Anything That Life Has To Offer

Many people have chosen work or friends or adventure over the family. They leave the nest early and rarely call their parents or siblings, even during emergencies or significant occasions. In their mind, it is okay because they are supposed to live their lives to the fullest.

In case you are among such folks with the same philosophy in life, you should know that you are sorely mistaken. During the quarantine, you essentially become cut off your work, friends, and adventure. The only individuals who may care to take you in are your family members. If you do not realize that soon enough, you may not get another chance to see their value.

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Final Thoughts

As I was trying to end this blog on a good note, I realized that not everyone had a family to come home to. Others might be estranged from their relatives for a good reason, too. If that is the case, I am sorry, and I hope you live with the individuals you love now. But assuming you and your loved ones still care for each other, you should see how beneficial it is to stick with them during the quarantine period.

Be thankful for a chance to spend your isolation days with family. Good luck!

Communication: Making Teens Talk and Listen

Talking to teenagers nowadays is difficult and more laborious more than ever. Parents find it challenging to build a good communication effectively with them.   One factor where relationship constraints occur between parents and their children is the problem in talking and trying to understand both parties. To understand teenagers’ feelings and thoughts, parents can employ different techniques. Here are examples of ways on how to encourage teens to express themselves and to practice active listening.

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Make Time For Them

Parents should convey to their teens that they are available any time to hear their stories and questions. If they sense that parents are not open, teens may tend to divert or seek attention to peers. At times, they might get advice from wrong people. One practice in providing openness is to stop what you are doing for a moment and start a conversation with your teens. In talking to them, maintain eye level contact, offer a calm environment and be attentive to what they are saying.

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Many times, teens will converse first about small things like schoolwork and their friends. They will first assess their parents’ readiness to listen. In return, parents should show interest in these mundane topics. Eventually, teens will confide secrets and essential information after gaining trust and confidence. Usually, a spontaneous conversation is the best type of “talk” with teenagers. It is best to create a fun yet learning environment for parents and the teenager. 

Show Respect 

When teens start to open about their views and concerns, do not criticize and make snide comments about their stand. Do not pull the rabbit from the hat prematurely. With the apparent generation gap, it is unavoidable for parents and teens to have an opposing view, but to get along, both parties should show respect. Parents need to acknowledge the differences and try to understand each other’s feelings. If so, teens will feel important and convey an open relationship.

Avoid Sermons: It’s No Longer Effective

Teens want a simple, straightforward answer from their parents. Long and lecturing parenting style is tiring and boring for youngsters. Long speeches are burdensome and outright, annoying. Teens tend to distance themselves and most likely will not share with you next time.

Acknowledge That You Make Mistakes Too

Human as they are. Parents have shortcomings too. Parents should not be hesitant in saying sorry or accepting wrongdoings. There is nothing wrong with apologizing. Teens can learn from their parents’ mistakes serve and will also enlighten teens that even in power, parents are not afraid to repent. This builds a good character as a role model. 

Encourage Independent Thinking

Although parents can give advice, they should draw a line to let their teens learn and discern truth for themselves.  Let them explore various ways on how to solve their problems and take accountability and responsibility from their decisions and choices. This will cultivate teens’ confidence and self – esteem.

Be A Trustworthy Confidant

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Teens want to talk about their problems privately and confidentially.  Parents should not indulge talking about their issues to other people. This will shatter an excellent connection and will not build up a healthy relationship between parents and their teens. 

If parents fail to obtain a clear understanding of their teens’ feelings, and teens will feel bad towards their parents, the equilibrium of relationship is lost. As a responsible parent, use every opportunity to influence your child to create and establish a good communication thereby, producing a good foundation for a parent-child relationship.

What Does It Mean To Become A Responsible Son Or Daughter?

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I am what people say as someone who has been raised as an independent child. At the age of 3, my mom already taught me how to dress up on my own and fix my bed in the morning. When I turned 5, I could babysit my little brother and prepare his milk formula. When I started going to elementary school, my dad would merely drop me off and pick me up at the bus stop.

In the eyes of practically every adult I know, I was a responsible offspring. I could take care of myself and even kids who are younger than me. I didn’t play outside, especially if my mother told me not to do so. I knew where to put all my toys back after playing with them. At the same time, however, I would hear them say, “I wish my child could carry such traits even when he becomes an adult.”

Indeed, now that I am a grown-up, I get that being a responsible offspring means more than knowing how to look after oneself or listening to parents. It also entails:

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Studying Hard For The Future

I believe it when someone says that life is not all about studying. You have to chill and try fun activities once in a while. Despite that, I have also realized the importance of studying hard to secure a fantastic future. Not every parent talks about it openly, but they feel a sense of pride whenever they see their child taking their education seriously. After all, it is one of the few gifts that cannot be taken away by anyone.

Not Giving Permanent Headache To Parents

A responsible son or daughter knows better than to do something that will give their mom and dad permanent headache as well. E.g., going to jail due to a crime, using drugs and refusing to quit, staying in a constant state of unemployment, etc.

Thinking About Loved Ones Before Making Huge Decisions

Only an irresponsible offspring will jump to rash decisions, such as leaving a job without looking for a new one or dropping out of school without any concrete plan for the future. They say it will make them happy, but they don’t think about how it will affect their parents. If you want to show your maturity, you should not do such things.

Understanding Bad Habits And Changing It

Responsible kids do not have to be told twice or a hundred times about their negative behaviors. They do not get upset either if their mom and dad tell them that what they are doing is wrong. Instead, they try to see the situation in the parents’ perspective. Upon realizing their fault, they are not afraid to apologize for their actions and correct them.

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Giving Back To Parents Even If They Insist That You Shouldn’t

It is typical for parents to stop their son or daughter from spending on them. They say, “Keep your money – we didn’t support you all these years so that you can feed us.” While you should respect their decision not to make you pay for their bills, you should insist on giving them a bit of luxury. For instance, you can take them to their dream destination or treat them to excellent meals every week.

Final Thoughts

Being responsible is one of the many ways to tell your mom and dad, “Thank you for raising me this way.” And even if you did not grow up close to your parents, it is never too late to alter your behavior and shower them with love and goodness.

 

Ways To Deal With A Parasitic Sibling

I have two younger sisters, and I love them to death. From the moment I got my first paycheck, I have made it my duty to give them everything they need. You can say that it is my way of giving back to my parents, who have supported me all through college.

During my first job, my middle sister, Anne, was still doing her internship in the hospitality sector. When you are in that industry, you always have to look good, so I would buy her clothes, shoes, makeup, etc. Even though I knew that my mom and dad gave her monetary allowance every week, I would transfer a couple of hundred dollars in her bank account. That way, she would have more than enough money to buy her needs.

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Before Anne graduated, we had a heart-to-heart talk. She told me how much she idolizes me for being a responsible big sister and daughter. She said that her goal was to follow my footsteps and do what I did for her to our youngest sister, who was still in high school at the time. Of course, the idea made me happy and looked forward to the day she could genuinely do that.

The problem is, in three years since she has entered the workforce, she has changed jobs thrice as well. Her complaint about the first workplace was that the pay was low. We were like, “Okay, that’s understandable. Look for another job.” I supported her financially while looking for a second employer. After finding one, though, she left it after another year, saying that it was too exhausting for her. We tolerated her again. Once more, I gave her money to apply for another job because she didn’t get to save her salary.

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It only hit me that my family and I are enabling my parasitic middle sister when she’s talking about leaving her third job to become a flight attendant. There won’t be any issue with that if it’s an upgrade from her previous one. However, the offered salary was only a third of what she gets from her current position. Worse, she has no money to sustain her needs while training as a flight attendant because she blew all her salary for clothes, shoes, and whatnot. It’s aggravating!

In this case, let me tell you how I dealt with her.

Brutal Honesty Is Key

The hard truth is that my parents have been complaining about my sister’s behavior already. With every job change, after all, they have to help her move all her cabinets, too. I told Anne that she’s being a pain in the you-know-what instead of assisting the family.

I also mentioned that she is becoming a financial burden, and that is not okay. Our obligation to support her financially should be over from the moment she graduated from college. Even if she knows we have money to spare, it doesn’t give her the right to let us worry about that.

I explained to my parents how wrong it is to enable a full-grown adult even further. It pained me to tell my sister these words, but I had to for everyone’s sake: “If you quit your current job, you cannot expect us to help you out again to get your next one.”

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How Did It Turn Out?

My parasitic sister was not happy at first, of course. She’s used to getting what she wants, and all of a sudden, we’re putting our feet down. Despite that, it woke her up from her dream that she could act like someone fresh out of college every time she wants a new job. Now, before making any decision, she thinks a hundred times before doing it. There was a bit of yelling and crying in the beginning, but it turned out to be a win-win situation for all.

You are most welcome to follow my lead if your sibling starts acting like a parasite as well.

How To Avoid Becoming The Black Sheep In The Family

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Coming from a family that is full of successful individuals in their respective fields has its ups and downs. As you build your career, these people can serve as your inspiration as well, for one. In case you require a tutor for a specific course, you can ask a relative to do it for you. It is also significant that if you ever need a doctor, lawyer, or financial adviser, you don’t have to call someone else. If it is a close cousin or a sibling or a parent, you probably even have them on speed dial.

The downside of having high achievers as family members, however, is that failing is practically not an option. You can make mistakes along the way, sure, but you need to come back better and stronger from that. Otherwise, you will tarnish your family’s fantastic reputation in society, and everyone will brand you as the “black sheep.”

Now, if you think that you are close to being named as such in your family, here’s what you can do to avoid it.

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Know Your Real Passion

The first thing that you should do is to figure out where your heart lies. Is it photography? Do you like teaching children? Do you want to be a pediatric surgeon?

There is no wrong answer at this point; you are free to be passionate about anything. What’s not ideal is wasting your time on trials and errors, even though you know deep down that that is not something you want to do.

Stick To Your Passion 

It seems typical for family members to offer suggestions about what you should do when you grow up. Your parents might say, “You should get a Business degree so that you can take over our company in the future.” Your favorite aunt might say, “Oh, that’s nonsense. You should become a dermatologist like me!”

I kid you not if you enter the business or medical field only because your loved ones told you so, you won’t be happy. You will be no different from the other millennials who wait tables to make ends meet, even if they dream of walking on the runway or becoming a pilot. You need to stick to your passion as that will allow you to excel in your craft and feel proud about it.

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Don’t Obligate Your Family To Clean Up Your Mess 

As mentioned above, making mistakes is a part of life. Perhaps the elders in your family have had their fair share of errors in the past, too. They will not disown you if you slip up a few times or want to change your career. The only time it can happen is if you hide your mistakes to them and then obligate them to iron out your problems.

Final Thoughts

Ideally, your loved ones have worked so hard to give you privileges that others cannot have. You should not waste this opportunity by being indecisive and becoming the black sheep in the family.

 

Tips In Making Time For Family (From A Therapist)

Family is the primary institution of society. Everyone belongs to a family, which means that no one is alone. However, over the years, we have found out that many families end up getting broken because of many factors. One of the common causes for the divorce of parents and consequent destruction of the family is the lack of time for the family. According to a therapist, many people in modern times are more focused on building their career or business. These individuals have already forgotten how to raise their own family.

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Because of this, we have decided to gather a list of tips and suggestions that you should consider if you want to have a happy family at all times. Our primary focus is to provide ideas on how one can make time for a family. Make sure that you read the entirety of this article to understand the different items mentioned. Here are some of the essential lessons that you must know:

 

Remember Your Kids

 

You must take a moment to appreciate the presence of a family in your life. You have to focus on the fact that you already have kids who need your time and attention. Make sure to stop thinking that just because they have lots of gifts, they can already be okay. Unfortunately, many parents cover their absence by giving gifts to their kids. This move is completely erroneous because it teaches the young ones to have a distant relationship with their parents. For sure, you do not want this to happen to your children. To make you feel more motivated to spend quality time with them, then always put them in your mind.

 

Go On Family Dates

 

Make your kids happy by bringing them together with some friends at school or in your subdivision. All you have to do is to send an invitation to the parents of the said children wherein you will encourage them to spend some time with you. The beautiful thing about this idea is that you can give your children a chance to get to know with each other before it becomes too late. However, you need to see to it that those who will join your family dates are nice and competent people. Otherwise, you may end up suffering more disadvantages instead of the advantages. Spending quality time with other families will teach your child the importance of building strong relationships within the community.

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Travel Together

 

If you have a long period away from work, you should use it to travel together. There is nothing more fun and exciting than organizing an enjoyable tour activity for everyone in the family. As such, you need to prepare their passports ahead of time. Take note that you may not know when the exact time your application will be approved. However, if you are only traveling locally, then you can always go to new cities through domestic flights or road trips. In moving together, you can renew your relationship with each other. At the same time, it can also make the family bond last longer because of the new experiences. When it comes to this matter, it is best if you will make the arrangements ahead of time.

 

Cook For The Family

 

When was the last time you prepared a sumptuous meal for everyone in the family? If you can no longer remember the day, then it is time to do it again as soon as possible. Invite your family members to come over on a Sunday and serve them your best dish. It is also ideal if you can also tell them to bring some of the food items that they want to share with everyone. In organizing this kind of gathering, the best thing that you must never forget is to get the attendance of all your family members ahead of time. You need to see to it that everyone will attend the little gathering so that you can bond with each other again. You can also prepare some exciting games and activities for the kids.

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Remember that family must always come first. No amount of money can ever buy you lost time with family members. Make sure that you make each and everyone feel valued. Go out of the way to make them smile at all times.

Causes of Infertility

Millions of men and women try for a baby each and every year only to find they are infertile. When that happens, a couple’s life can be shattered and it truly is devastating news. However, why is someone infertile? What are the causes of infertility and can they be reversed? Read on to find out more.

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Long-Term Illness or a Past Illness

There are many reasons as to why someone might become infertile. One common reason is from a long-term illness. Illnesses such as cancer may prevent someone from being able to have a child depending on the treatment and severity of the condition. For example, ovarian cancer may result in the ovaries being removed or even in other such cancers, the radiation in which the person is exposed to can make them infertile. Cancer isn’t the only serious illness that might make someone unable to have a child. Some people who have had cancer are still able to have children but there are many others who cannot. It depends on the treatment and the exact illness. 

Being Obese

To be honest, you wouldn’t think carrying a few extra pounds would be detrimental infertility and yet it plays a massive role. When you are obese there is a great strain put on your body and it might be unable to carry a child. What’s more, if the hormones are off-balance, it may prevent you from being able to carry a child. Women who want to get pregnant and who are extremely overweight or obese often find they must lose weight to even stand the chance of becoming pregnant. It can be a tricky area for women to say the least.

Have a Vasectomy

For men, they may become infertile through a vasectomy. Now, this is something for men which can be extremely painful but it can lead to infertility. However, vasectomies might be able to be reversed. This is something worth looking into for men who wish to try for a baby. Whether the reversal will be successful is down to nature. Sometimes, it works and sometimes it doesn’t. In truth, it can vary.

Problems with the Reproductive Organs

Nature plays its part when it comes to fertility. Sometimes, a person just isn’t destined to carry a baby. It’s cruel but it happens. For some, they have issues and problems with their reproductive organs and find even after they have undergone treatment there is no way they will conceive. It can be extremely tough on men and women alike as they can find they feel less like a woman or man since they cannot have a child.

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A Cruel Twist of Fate

The causes of infertility vary. There are many reasons as to why someone might become infertile and unable to have a child. For some, they can undertake a series of tests and treatments to help reverse the problems; some are successful and some are not. It’s difficult because sometimes there is no way of knowing what will be a success. Infertility can be a cruel part of life and one which devastates most.

 

Don’t Let Infertility Ruin Your Marriage

What happens when you or your partner is unable to conceive a child? Infertility is one of the most terrifying obstacles a couple can face today and yet it’s becoming even more common. Unfortunately, there are some who cannot have a child of their own and news like that can ruin a marriage. Is it possible to overcome these issues? Read on to find out more information about overcoming infertility and preventing a broken marriage today.

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How Can You Overcome Infertility?

First and foremost, you might want to talk to someone who has gone through it and experienced the same pains and emotions you’ve felt. It could be helpful to find a support group that specializes in this area. It doesn’t matter if you’re infertile or your partner is, it’s good to talk about it and by talking about it to those who’ve gone through it, you can feel less alone. This can be extremely effective and also a much simpler way to prevent a marriage from being ruined.

Talking To a Counselor

Counseling and therapy are very important, to say the least. When you have gone through infertility and your marriage is at breaking point you might be wise to talk to a professional. Professionals can talk you through your emotions and feelings and help find a positive light at the end of the tunnel. What’s more, if you aren’t angry but worried your partner will look for someone who is fertile, a counselor can help put your mind at ease. Counseling can be a great thing for a marriage as it helps both parties come together and discuss their worries in a calm and safe environment. 

Don’t Let Infertility Ruin Your Marriage – Get Help and Overcome the Problems

When one or both parties in a relationship are infertile it can knock the balance. A once happy couple can honestly feel less happy and feel they are growing apart from their spouse which can lead to a broken marriage. You wouldn’t think not being able to have a child would break a loving family apart but it’s such a highly emotionally charged issue that you never know what will happen. Some people can move on with this and be happy with their life as it is or look at other ways to have a family such as fostering or adoption. Unfortunately, there are many who cannot overcome this and it’s tragic. That is one of the most important reasons to get help. Talking to a counselor or a support group can help prevent a marriage from breaking down and getting over the hurt. continue reading from http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-4579190/Marriage-key-longer-life.html

Become a Stronger Couple

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Infertility will be a contentious issue for millions of couples worldwide and it’s such a tragic thing. Men and women are desperate to be parents and can’t and for them, they truly struggle to overcome these emotions. It’s not easy to deal with your emotions because being told you aren’t able to have a child is earth-shattering. However, with professional help and support, it’s possible to help get through these tough times and prevent a marriage from breaking down.

 

Emotional Ramifications of Infertility

When you are dealt with the devastating news that you are infertile, how can you honestly go on? It’s devastating news and not something you ever want to hear, whether you’re young or old but unfortunately, it happens on a day-to-day basis. When it does happen, it’s shattering and for some, they cannot process the news. Worst still, there are many emotional ramifications to come from infertility.

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You Feel Hurt and Angry

For the most part, people start off very emotional, they cry and feel very upset but that can soon turn into anger and that is the number one emotion for most people. When someone finds out they’re infertile, they can become very angry and it’s one emotional ramification of infertility. It’s human nature to become angry and you don’t want to think there is something wrong with you as to why you cannot have a child. It’s frightening and something that destroys a person so much so they don’t want to go on living. That is why it’s necessary to find an outlet for the grief.

You May Be Unable To Get Over the Fact Your Infertile

Thousands truly cannot comprehend what infertility really means. They know it means they cannot have a child but they cannot actually understand why they are not able to personally. While some deal with it in another manner, there are many who struggle to get over this news. It impacts their life in a major way and cannot deal with it; there are some women driven to suicide and others who never want to get close to the man they love. Every woman and man reacts differently and not getting over the situation is truly one ramification of infertility.

Denial and Dismissive

The emotional ramifications of infertility can present themselves in a host of ways. For some, they experience anger and hurts but for many others, they cannot process it. Some couples try to honestly forget it as they think it’s not possible. Denial is really one major part of the process and it’s important to go through each stage so that you can come out the other end and be able to find a way to help your situation. For some, it’s all about being able to move on with their lives and for others, it’s exploring other options.

How to Deal With Your Emotions?

If you want to find a way to deal with your emotions, you need to look at getting some help in the form of a counselor or therapy. This can be vastly important when it comes to coming to terms with the condition and overcoming it. Infertility will remain a big part of your life but it’s also necessary to find a way to deal with it so that you aren’t stuck with the same mind frame. Therapy might sound scary but it’s a necessity in allowing you to come to terms with your grief. learn more from https://youandyoursshow.com/

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Find A Way to Move On

It seems harsh to say move on with your life but, in truth, it’s necessary if you ever want to become happy again. Yes, being infertile is awful and you will feel as though your world has been taken from you but there are many avenues to explore. You cannot give up and if you get the help you need, you never know how more positive you can feel.

 

Questions to Ask Yourself Before Getting Married

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The idea of marrying and spending a lifetime with the person you love the most is so pure and welcome. You’ll have a stable source of energy whenever you feel exhausted; he’ll stay beside you even if you hit rock bottom, and vice versa. Despite that, it won’t be wise to say ‘I do’ immediately based on that. Ask yourself these questions before getting married.

Am I ready to settle down?

That’s the billion-dollar question, isn’t it? A lot of women think twice about accepting a marriage offer from the beloved boyfriend because they either want to hold on to their independence a bit longer or assume they’re still too young.
If it helps, though, according to a sociologist from the University of Utah, the perfect age to marry is around 28 to 32 years old. You would’ve accomplished many things by then, so that won’t preferably be a problem.

In case there are other matters at play, take them into account as well.

Do we share similar interests?

The simplest way to put it is, “Out of the 10 activities that you like, how many of those does he like too?”
It’s clear that any number below 4 isn’t good since it entails that you have fewer commonalities. It may translate to plenty of misunderstandings in the future, and you know where that will end once left unresolved: divorce.

Personally speaking, the ideal score is close to 7, because then you still have room to kiss and makeup. Getting 10 out of 10 strips you of that experience as it means you agree on everything (read: dull).

Source: thoughtcatalog.com

Do I know him enough?

You and your man lived separate lives before you met; that’s why it’s highly possible that he has beliefs and preferences that are diverse from yours. For instance, he may be religious; you’re not. He may want five kids; you prefer 2. While there are other angles you should look at; your primary goal is to find out if you can still accept each other regardless of the differences.

Can we handle conflicts like adults?

Disagreements happen in any relationship, so expect it to occur even when you’re married. What’s important is how you two deal with it. Just a heads’ up, it’s never OK to bottle up your sentiments rather than talking it out right there. In case you do the opposite of that, then you’re in the right place.

Do I see a future with him?

This final question matters as well because you need to assess your feelings for him at the end of the day. You already know how he is as an individual at this point, so you should have enough basis to tell if he’s the one or not.

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In Conclusion

If you answered ‘yes’ to all the questions above, then yes, you can get married to your partner ASAP. In case there’s a ‘no’; however, even just one, reconsider your choices. Until then, focus on knowing and loving each other. Good luck!